Better is a dinner of herbs where love is,
Than a fatted calf with hatred. (Proverbs 15:17 NKJV)

Sometimes, a phrase will pop into my head, like the question: Where is the love? I don’t really know where this question came from. And I certainly did not know where my musings would lead me. Last night, I put the question in my search engine on the Internet. The first hit was the Black-Eyed Peas song, titled: Where is the Love?

I wasn’t very familiar with their music, but I appreciate this song, and how the lyrics pose a question regarding many of the tragedies, which our world faces day in and day out. While I was listening to the Black-Eyed Peas, my husband suggested that there was another song that my audience might appreciate, as well, by the same title, sung by Roberta Flack and Donny Hathaway. (Where is the Love?) More of a love lament between two people. I was struck by how both songs embody the same question, while one is a communal cry for love; the other is a cry for exclusive love between a couple.

Where is the love?

I challenge  you to listen to the songs, and then respond with a 5 minute quick write to answer the question: Where is the love?

Another journal prompt, if you dare! Finish this statement: Where love is . . .

I would love to hear where this question leads you!

God called to the Man: “Where are you?” (Genesis 3:9 The Message)

As we continue our quest with question words, we arrive today at where. Where, believe it or not has it origins with who. Knowing where we are, apparently can lead us to a deeper understanding of who we are.

I find it quite interesting that the first question GOD asks is “Where are you?” He could have started with a different question, but he doesn’t. His first concern is the whereabouts of his newly created human beings. Where matters.

Where can be about place, but in this context, I believe it is about proximity. GOD the Creator, seems forlorn that his new companions have moved out of his sight. He could have directly chastised them, but instead he asks, “Where are you?” “Why have you moved?” “Don’t you want to be with me and enjoy our evening walk?” I can’t say with certainty what the mood was in those moments, but I imagine GOD was sad.

Out of all the questions, where is the one most anchored in the physical. When we ask where, we want to know the physical location of a person or place or thing. Like, “Where are my keys?” Also, where can be used figuratively. One example, where both meanings apply is the question: “Where are you going?” It could be taken as a question about your destination. Or it could be interpreted, as where are you going with this idea or plan? I find it very intriguing, this question of where, so much more to explore.

As with all of these questions, a definition can expand our understanding.

a: at, in, or to what place <where is the house> <where are we going> b :  at, in, or to what situation, position, direction, circumstances, or respect <where does this plan lead> <where am I wrong> (www.m-w.com)

How does your where influence the way you experience your who-ness?

Unrelenting disappointment leaves you heartsick,
    but a sudden good break can turn life around. (Proverbs 13:12 The Message)

Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
    but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. (Proverbs 13:12 NIV)

“So, tell me what you want, what you really, really want.” (Spice Girls)

Do you ever have days, when you know there is something you want, but you just don’t know what it is? That happens to me, especially when I’m going through a transition or a restless spell. I’ve been a little more settled with April, but some days I just don’t know what I want to do.

Oh, let me assure you there are plenty of things I need to do, but I don’t want to do those things. So, I putter around the house, looking at my email and social media. I sit in my chair, and think about stuff. I move to the porch swing with my mug of coffee, I sway for awhile, then I come back inside to see if the dishes disappeared or the clothes magically floated down the stairs and into the washer.

Nope, still there. I go back to my chair, to rearrange the books and magazines that have accumulated on my footstool. I notice my journal, and remember that I wanted to contemplate the questions of life. Specifically, the “what” question.

Here are some raw ramblings straight from my journal:

reflecting on what

woke up thinking about how “what” relates to other question words–it is the most generic–it describes a person, place, thing or idea, sort of like a noun– it gets to the details in the investigation–it is the observer of the lot–it can lead to the how or the why–it’s related to who, where and when, but these three are more specific in their what-ness–what directs, interrogates, interviews, deduces, detects, discovers, uncovers and relates details–we often ask: What does _______ mean?

Aha! “What” defines!

Combining what with want seems like a simple enough proposition, yet knowing, defining or articulating what I/we want takes courage. In the past, I was afraid to express what I wanted for fear of disappointing someone else, or more accurately for fear of disappointing myself. What if I couldn’t have or get what I wanted? What if I did get what I desired, yet it left me wanting? I would have to take the risk.

I can’t always get what I want, but defining and naming those desires, and opening up myself to the possibility of experiencing them brings me great hope and joy.

It’s okay to want something, even something that you can’t quite describe yet. Keep asking yourself the what question, and see what surfaces.

Here are some prompts for you to explore:

What I want, right now is . . .

I don’t want to . . .

I really, really want . . .

My tree of life looks like … (write about this or make a collage for this one)

If you come up with another way to pose this question, I would love to have you share it with us in the comments!

What do people get for all the toil and anxious striving with which they labor under the sun? (Ecclesiastes 2:22 NIV)

It is awfully important to know what is and what is not your business. (Gertrude Stein)

What a person desires is unfailing love  . . . (Proverbs 19:22 NIV)

what (pronoun): used to ask for information about someone or something (www.m-w.com)

What is a very versatile question word. In usage it is considered a pronoun, which makes sense because sometimes we use “what” to refer to something, rather than posing a question. (Remember, a pronoun can take the place of a noun.)

From my experience it seems to be the most common question word. We often ask, what is this? What does this mean? What is happening? What is next? What is your favorite this or that? What do you want or need?

When we meet a new person we rarely ask, who are you? But rather, we ask, what do you do? Why, we might ask, is that? In origin, what is closely related to who. Both come from Old English and Latin words that were interchangeable. Both relate to identity. Identifying the characteristics, conditions or concerns of a subject matter is what is implied, when we ask the what questions. When we are investigating the who-ness of someone, even ourselves, it is natural to consult the what-ness of  our existence.

I am not sure I can answer the who question, without telling you the what. Such as, I could tell you that I am a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a friend, a writer, an artist  or a homemaker. While all those influence my who-ness, each role describes what I do, more than who I am.

I could describe myself in terms of qualities, such as, kind, loving and generous. But some days, I am irritable, hateful and mean-spirited. What would be the most accurate way to identify myself? I could draw or paint a self-portrait or take a selfie. (Did you know that on your i-Phone, it tells you how many selfies you have stored? Mine says I have 39!) What is that about? Maybe, how we see ourselves can be a hint to our who-ness. And how we perceive that others see us, too!

See how this question of what, keeps bringing me back to who. Who knew that a question could have so many twists and turns?

Once a month, I teach/facilitate an art class, which is a self-discovery process in disguise. We play with color, try to explain positive and negative space to each other, we glue bits and pieces together to express our created selves. We often ask ourselves questions with journal prompts. One recurring concept that we’ve considered is self-portraiture.

Whether we use a silhouette or a simple sketch or a collage of images and words that describe us, each activity adds layers to our understanding of our self.

This past week, I suggested that we try to make a self-portrait without using a face. What would it look like to gather images and words to “describe” us. This weekend, I took the challenge to heart, and tried a daunting exercise. In The Collage Workshop by Randel Plowman, he suggests that you take a magazine and collect one image or word from each page. I chose a magazine that was about 90 pages. (If you try this at home, you may want to find a very short magazine 🙂

The challenge to find a way to create a unified composition from the various culled material intrigued me and surprised me. I couldn’t glue everything on just one page, so I sorted the images and left the words out. Both pages reflect interests that I have and images that I gravitate towards. One has quite a few chairs. Chairs represent repose and reflection to me. The other side included paintings and photographs of women and some flowers and pops of bright blue. I like both sides, but the side with the chairs felt more like my “self-portrait.” Before this challenge, I came across a phrase in a travel ad. It surprised me how the phrase moved me to tears, when I read it aloud to the art class. To give it proper space in my self-understanding, I glued it to the center of my collage.

The challenge was satisfying, and I like how the serendipity of images from a single magazine could express some of who I am, right now. (As I glued images down, I gave myself permission to leave out a few, as well as cover up images with each addition, and I did not use many words.) I did include the word “daily” along with the time phrase on the self-portrait page. Daily, of course, speaks of time in a day to day proportion, which is just enough for me. One day at a time, truly becomes the place where I can experience everything, which that day offers.

On the side with the faces, the words “flowers” and “peaceful visions” surfaced. I enjoy sitting with these visual observations.  I am learning that I don’t need to ask “What does it mean?” as often as I used to do.

What is your experience with “what”?

 

 

 

…have unity of spirit, sympathy, love for one another, a tender heart and a humble mind. (1Peter 3:8 NRSV)

As this week ends, I am still thinking about the question of who.

And the word itself, made me wonder, why did a music group call themselves “The Who?” Why wasn’t the famous Doctor of time travel named Dr. What or Dr. Why or Dr. How? (Ludicrous, I know, but if you think about it, he wouldn’t be so endearing with any other name besides, Dr. Who.)

Who is personal. Who offers us an emotional connection. Who can be individual. Who can be communal. Who can be exclusive. Who can be inclusive. Who we are informs how we experience life and interact with each other.

Answering the question, “Who am I?” can influence our well-being, for good or for harm, depending on what we believe about our “who-ness.” Believing in yourself is key, and even more affirming when others believe in you, too.

In Horton Hears a Who, a whole community is saved. Horton’s compassion compels him to defend these “other” world beings at his own peril.  The others refuse to believe Horton, just because they didn’t hear or notice what he did.

Dr. Suess, was a great champion of the who, both individual and communal, in his stories.

Here’s a quote from Dr. Suess that always makes me smile:

Today you are you!
That is truer than true!
There is no one alive
Who is you-er than you!

How are you celebrating you and the other “whos” out there? In what ways are you being a champion for others?

After you finish responding to the prompt, reread what you wrote down. What surprises you? What do you notice? What are you aware of?

Come back on Monday to explore the next question word: WHAT!