Why: For What Cause, Reason or Purpose

Seeking answers through collage work

Why do you think we ask why?

I posed that question to myself and fellow journal keepers in writing class this week. We’ve been making queries and seeking answers through the tip of our pens and random magazine images.

We’ve gleaned insight and shared wisdom by writing and talking and pondering questions together.

As the others in class write quietly, I join them in my own journal.

Here are my musings from yesterday:

Why do we ask why? Because we’re curious, we want to know more, to understand and to be understood, for comfort, for courage, for confidence? How to get it “right” or correct?

I ask why when I don’t understand. Why is not doubt–it’s curiosity; it’s cause and effect. A curious child asks why out of a need for knowledge and understanding. I don’t think it occurs to them that they might be questioning some authority–it’s just a simple why, a inquiry of how come such and such occurs this way or that way. But why do they keep asking why after someone explains–are they not satisfied with the answer? A teenager seemingly asks why out of some inner angst–but what if, they are just trying out their voice, wanting to be heard. Working out their own identity, purpose and reason for being.

As an adult, my whys have been more about wanting closure, to know why something happened to me or to someone else, questions for the Creator of the Universe. I want explanations. I need some defense or answer to give myself or another who is confused, baffled, hurting and broken. I demand an answer, but then I wonder will I be satisfied with such an answer. Maybe expressing why is more of a lament. A means to say out loud that I am confused, frustrated or even just curious. To use why as a lament helps me to grieve and to process unwelcome and unwieldly emotions and circumstances.

It’s okay if I don’t get a solid answer to why. It’s okay to not know. We can ask why as a way to explore and discover, to express our emotions, even to test the validity or consistency of a thing, an idea or even another person’s actions toward us. We may not always be right. We might misconstrue motives or intent. We might never get an answer. But this doesn’t have to be as infuriating, as it might have been when the only answer from a parent was “because I said so!” Now, we can voice our whys and sit with the silences, the suppositions and the comfort of not needing to know it all.

After our writing time, I invited the class to respond to one of the following activities:

  • Imagine a child asking why. Write down questions they might ask.
  • Imagine a teenager asking why. Write out their questions.
  • Imagine an adult asking why. Compose their questions.
  • Create a magazine collage to answer your why questions.
  • Write a spine poem to answer one of your why questions.
  • Make a mind map of your why question to brainstorm answers and insights.

One person started with why in a circle and then branched out with the questions who, what, where, when, and how did she ask why, then added another layer to each of those circles with how did a child, teenager or adult ask why. It was fun witnessing her joy, as she mapped out what was going on in her mind.

For the spine poem, I used the word “why” and this popped into my head:

Wondering
How to
Yield

Next with some trepidation, not sure if it would work, I chose to thumb through some phrases and images from magazines that I had randomly cut out. I was surprised by how the words and images helped me to express my “answers” to why, and then the images also caused me to ask why again. Why a nest? Why would a teenager think this collage was boring? Why don’t butterflies build nests? But the one phrase that summarized my musings the most was: “The answer to our deepest needs.” That phrase confirmed my idea that asking why in and of itself might just be one of our deepest needs.

For what reasons do you ask why?

Even the psalmists asks why:

I look up at your macro-skies, dark and enormous, your handmade sky-jewelry, Moon and stars mounted in their settings. Then I look at my micro-self and wonder, Why do you bother with us? Why take a second look our way? (Psalm 8:3-4 The Message)

Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues? Fix my eyes on God— soon I’ll be praising again. He puts a smile on my face. He’s my God. (Psalm 42:5 The Message)

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Devotion (Intuition Diaries)

The “brain” on Intuition

When we take our boat out for excursions, our devotion to the trip happens well before we leave for our destination.

We have been dreaming and preparing and practicing over the last ten years for this particular trip. When we first got the boat, I remember promising myself and Les that for boating to remain fun, we’d have to plan on enjoying the packing, the trip and the unpacking. We weren’t done with a trip until those things happened.

As you might imagine this is an important attitude to maintain as we prepare for our Alaska trip. (This summer, we hope to explore what is called the Inside Passage in southeastern Alaska on our boat.) To embark on such an adventure has taken devotion, and we will need that intention as we move forward.

New Oxford American Dictionary defines devotion as, “love, loyalty or enthusiasm for a person, activity or cause.” I am sure all of these elements will be tested in our pursuit of this dream of a lifetime trip.

Even as I write this blog post, we have devoted most of this past week to outfitting, updating and adding upgrades to our beloved Intuition. As a team, my husband and I have lovingly and with some frustration installed a windlass for the anchor, made space for a hot water heater under our sink, and made a storage bench to place in the back. Today, we will be removing, replacing and repairing deck pieces in the cockpit or the “back porch” of the boat, as I like to call it.

All of this takes time, expense and a lot of strong words (or praying) to make it all work out. We have been pleased with the money we have saved, despite the setbacks, by doing our own wiring and plumbing. My job has mostly been to admire my husband’s workmanship, but I’ve also been on hand to measure, turn a screwdriver and problem solve when the process goes awry.

Pictured above is the wiring for all the electrical elements of the boat. Normally it is covered, and remains hidden above my head (on my side of the berth/bed.) At first glance it looks messy and convoluted, but really, it’s an elegant mess, which is really quite complex and necessary. If one wire is misplaced or dislodged then something is not going to work. It’s important to protect the “brain” of the boat. By working together, I have gained a greater appreciation for all the intricacies of the innards of the Intuition. As I looked at the wires, I gained a greater appreciation for the human brain, and how important and complex a gift it is. I often take my brain for granted, but today, I am more aware and ever so grateful that the Master Electrician wired me just the way I am.

“Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God–you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made!” (Psalm 139:13 The Message)

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Pilgrimage: Any Long Journey, Especially One Undertaken as a Quest

Happy are the people whose strength is in you,
whose hearts are set on pilgrimage. (Psalm 84:5 CSB)

For the past twenty-one years, my heart has been set on a pilgrimage. A quest to write words for the weary. About ten years ago, I published some of those words in a small volume called, Defining Moments: Overflowing with Living Words. A couple years after that, I began a pilgrimage, which I call souldare. I had a separate website from this blog, and this year it seemed like a lot of effort to maintain both. So today, I introduce to you one place to find all aspects of souldare. This blog site and the iterations before this one have had many names, but most of them contained the word “soul.” This is a place to meet your own soul, to reveal my soul and to meet other souls. And it’s still a spot to take in a few words, especially if you feel weary.

I am an adventurer, a seeker, a writer and an artist. I am a person who likes to share and explore and discover, while inviting others to quest with me.

When I started the souldare pilgrimage, I mulled over and sought help with developing a business plan. Crafting words to describe my intents, my hopes and dreams for this idea weighed me down. My friend and life coach, cheered me on to create a business plan that worked for me. So one day, I gathered a blank canvas that I was saving for something important. And a pile of magazine images that had been sitting in my studio for a couple years and some paint I never used because it was expensive. With all these at hand, I started playing and creating and finding words and images that resonated with me. The image above was the result. I know what it means and it inspires me to keep developing this thing called souldare.

I want to appreciate all the souls, not by name, but from my fond memory of witnessing each of us, as we grappled with our created selves, who journeyed with me while discovering that we are artists and writers and dreamers and creators and lovers of all things; both the good and the difficult. Without you all, souldare would be nothing.

It would take many posts to describe the pilgrimage, but for now I just wanted to say:

“Welcome!” to souldare.com

This space will now be the online base camp for all future souldare pilgrimages. My own writing journey. The souldare experiences. The adventures called “Intuition Diaries” and “Cereal Bowl Series” and “Defining Moments.” The classes, which are really creative communities where we explore writing prompts and artistic expression. Come back often to see what’s happening.

For now, I have archived most of my page links, as I develop new content. This summer, this site will be the landing platform for the next big adventure: taking the Intuition (our happy little boat) to the inland passage of Alaska!

Have a happy day!

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Cereal Bowl Series

a weekly series of fiction to enjoy with your bowl of cereal

Igor and Spank by Kel Rohlf

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Igor insisted that we drive to a nearby town to buy dog food. He was afraid someone might recognize him at our local grocery store. I thought he was being irrational, but drove across the river to the next town to the IGA, and bought dog food. On the drive back to my house, I wondered what Jack would think of my decision. Igor and Spank were quiet. Back at the house, I put fresh sheets on Adam’s bed and found some pajamas for Igor.

It was getting late, so I suggested we all head to bed. Igor agreed, but first asked, “Where’s Spank going to sleep?”

“I don’t know. Doesn’t he just sleep on the floor? I never had a dog before.”

“Well, usually he sleeps with me.”

“Oh.”

“This isn’t my house, so I understand if you don’t want him in one of your beds.”

“No, it’s okay. This is a special circumstance,” I smiled at him and he gave me a big hug.

After the hug, I led them to the room. Igor climbed in bed, and then patted the cover to invite Spank to join him. I watched them from the doorway. Spank curled up at Igor’s feet, and Igor smiled at me. “Gail, can I ask you one more thing?”

“Sure, will you say the bedtime prayer with me? Momma always does.”

“Um…I don’t know any prayers, Igor. But I’ll listen while you say it.”

“Can you come sit on the bed with us?”

I hesitated, and told myself that it would be okay. I walked over and sat on the bed. And Igor folded his hands on his chest and closed his eyes, “Abba, Father, bless us and keep us this night. You who never sleep nor slumber, watch over all your children. Give us good dreams or no dreams at all. Amen.” He finished, then opened his eyes. “Thanks, Gail…for everything.” I patted his arm, and stood up to go to my bed. “Gail?”

I turned back to look at Igor, “Do you ever have dreams?”

“You mean like when I’m sleeping.”

“Yes”

“Sometimes.”

“Are they ever good?”

“Not usually. Usually I’m lost or trapped or carried away by…”

“By what?

“A Chinese dragon.”

“Oh…that’s kind of weird,” he smiled at me.

“I know, but it’s a recurring theme. Why did you ask?”

“I don’t know, I was just curious. Dreams have always been important to me and my momma.”

“I noticed it was part of your prayer.”

“Yes, I added that part because I didn’t want to have any nightmares tonight.”

“Does that help?”

“Sometimes, but not always.”

“Ok, well I think we better get some sleep now.”

Igor yawned, “Good night, Gail.”

“Good night, Igor.” I gently closed the door, but left it open a crack.

I woke with a start. I looked over at the clock, it was 4:34 am. Ugh, just for once I would like to sleep all night and wake up with the sun. As I lay there, I recalled that a boy and his dog were sleeping across the hallway. What was I going to do? I couldn’t keep them here forever. Jack would know what to do. But did I really want to get him involved. Why wouldn’t I call the police? What would I tell them? This boy I hardly knew came to my house, and said his mother was taken away by some mysterious men. Would they believe me? And Igor seemed relieved when I said I wouldn’t get the police involved. I wonder about the International Co-op, maybe they would know what to do. I wish I could find that article Elena mentioned in People magazine. I let these ideas roll around in my head, talking myself out of them one by one. Finally, I got out of bed quietly and went downstairs to the basement office to search the internet.

I typed in Bosnian refugees and People magazine. A few articles came up, and I clicked on the first one. The article claimed that bodies in the mass graves from the genocide would be hard to identify because the bodies were not buried whole. How horrible. I read on and there were reports that some of the men were able to escape, but their fates were hindered by land mines, fatal wounds or starvation. Not much hope for Igor’s dream of being reunited with his father. I clicked out of the article, and typed in International Co-op. Their website was the first hit. I scrolled through their services, and determined I would call them in the morning anonymously to see if they could help me sort out the situation. I wrote down the phone number on a sticky note, then I headed back to bed. I remained awake for a while still wondering what Jack would think of my choices.

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Advent: Come into Being or Use

“O Lord, you alone are my hope; I’ve trusted you from childhood.” (Psalm 71:5 TLB)

As Advent arrived this past Sunday, I set my heart to think about my journey with this season. I didn’t really learn about the practice of observing Advent until I was an adult. My husband and I wanted to include a spiritual focus to our celebrations, and as a young couple we started the tradition of lighting candles and reading Scriptures related to the season. We carried this through with our young family. When the boys were old enough, they seemed most interested in blowing the candles out. Some friends recommended a book that included readings and activities to do with your children. The boys and my husband humored me and did the activities and answered the questions. I know sometimes it was boring and probably not their thing, but as we all grew up, it was a tradition we held onto right through their teen years. One year, I remember we each took a turn coming up with the topic for the devotion. Fond memories. Each year was different.

One year I noticed that the word, adventure, included the word advent. After that the tone of my advent devotions took on a new wonder and energy. This year as I contemplated how I might observe advent, I got out my dictionary to see what the definition said about it. The first ones mention the church observance, but the one that caught my attention was the entry for the verb form of advent.

It means a coming into being or use, such as the advent of a new season. And that set my heart to wondering what might come into being this season, as I choose REST. What kind of uses will become part of my observance this year? I set up candles. I found a book that I like to read during this season. And I made an art journal to chronicle my journey visually and with words.

I was going to make a list of 25 words to contemplate each day up to Christmas. I didn’t get to it. But that doesn’t mean I can’t make one now. My idea was to gather a list of words or phases that speak of rest to me.

So as I write this post, I will add them here as an invitation for you to find rest in these words this season. Look up their definitions. Write about them. Doodle around them. Create a collage. Take a photo that reminds you of the word. Or just sit with them and enjoy.

Here’s the list:

  1. Stay
  2. Repose
  3. Put your feet up
  4. Calm
  5. Tranquility
  6. Nap
  7. Peaceful
  8. Unhurried
  9. Stillness
  10. Quiet
  11. Rejuvenate
  12. Relax
  13. Silence
  14. Leisure
  15. Take a break
  16. Slumber
  17. Take it easy
  18. Carefree
  19. Interlude
  20. Respite
  21. Intermission
  22. Unwind
  23. Respite
  24. Pause
  25. Partake

What do you hope will come into being or use this season?

Posted on by kelrohlf 0